I’m a day late on the blog. But I’m also five days on losing any significant weight, so that balances, right?
Yesterday, I closed the chapter on Month 2. I’d like to do the thing where I say: time is flying by! I can’t believe it’s been so long! But, let’s get real. I can believe it. This program is work. It is not easy. It is discipline, and waking up with the right attitude. It’s coercing yourself to stick with it. And not giving into temptation. So yeah, it’s been 2 months. I believe it.
Where I am in disbelief is the dramatic changes my body has seen. In just two months, I feel like I am really starting to look like my old self again. My leather jacket fits. My dresses fit. My bras are too big. I have the want to put on jeans again. My knee highs don’t roll down. My panties don’t, either. And as a woman, can we all just agree how fucking embarrassing that can be? (It’s happened to you, admit it.)
I have slowed down on the weight loss again. I’m getting used to it. Big jumps, then slow increments. I finally nudged down to 204.8 last week for my 25lb loss, but I’ve only inched down a mere 2 oz since. This is expected, and I’m taking it in stride. I also traveled back home again this weekend, and I can’t stress enough how the toughest part of the program is staying committed while you’re away.
My family gorged out on an incredible turkey dinner with all the fixins while I watched on with my Caesar salad. But, again, what do you want? What will it take to get there? What work are you planning to invest to get to your goal? It won’t always be like this. But like Rome wasn’t built in a day, the things you want the most will take blood, sweat, and tears. Emphasis on the tears. Some days, I want to cheat so bad, but I haven’t. And the results of that commitment are showing.
Part of staying true to this program and what it expects of me is demanding my body do as its told. I have tried weight loss/fitness programs in the past and have always found a way out. Oh, the class was too early. I slipped on the ice and hurt my wrist. Better give up. But not this time; this time, it’s no excuses. And I’ve got cardio on lock. So Tracy is kicking my ass through core training.
She had me pushing an iron sleigh with a 45lb plate across the turf of the gym floor. Dudes. I thought I was going to fall apart. And then it was planks, and push ups with our exercise balls. My objective is tone my body as hard, and as strong as I can.
So what has two months taught me?
That my stubbornness outweighs my desire to “loosen the reigns”. I am as committed today as I was in July. The difference now is that I am on this program as a part of my life, and not something neat I’m trying on for size. This way of doing things has infiltrated my daily, and my confidence in the program is growing. I can see where I’ve lost inches. I can make my own rules inside the program’s limitations; example, this Saturday, I’ll be enjoying my treat meal during Kid C’s birthday dinner. And again next month on Thanksgiving. Those are my choices. And I’m confident enough in my ability to juggle this program around it’s requirements and still living my life. Also – I finally found the “permitted” bread on this program. And it’s saved my life. I missed bread so much.
I did a piss poor job of documenting my food this week. Much of it were staples of the food I really love. Chicken Caesar salads for lunch. Hashtag NOT Tim Curry for dinners. Fajitas. Deconstructed Big Macs. The newest I’ve added was the aforementioned bread, which I now (because I’m given one slice at a time) grill on the pan and top like an open faced sandwich (cue my brother in law Rob naming it “Julius (Ceasar) Face Down on the Mattress (piece of bread)”. I just shake my head. lol The chocolate dream dip has become a mainstay for snacks. So much so, Kid C is taking them for lunch, as well. *drool*
And, my weekly weigh-in snap.
I’m still down just over 25lbs. I’ve added an extra inch back to my bust (hellllllooo Shark Week approaching), but I’ve knocked off almost another inch off my midsection, and an additional inch and a half off my waist. Overall, that’s almost 10 inches off my tummy, and 7 off my hips. And this is why I accept the plateaus as they arrive. My body is shape shifting in ways I could have never expected. And it’s also why I’m motivated to not sneak that licorice all sort. That cookie off the plate I cooked up for the girls’ after school snack. Why I am looking for new, and creative ways to enjoy Greek yogurt. Why I’m designing recipes that are filling, and delicious. Because the program works.
You can if you want to.